Dad instinct....

A lot of the parenting books describe how new parents will be able to take care of their kids by instinct. They talk about how dads and moms will just know how to nurture their kids and help them along and after a while, parenting will be very natural. Well, the other day, my inert dad instinct failed, at least I hope it was a failure and not some sort of subconscious statement about being irritated with Soijer. We were in the bathroom hanging out in the morning, we being the whole family. Soijer was happily climbing on the step stool which normally Ephram is very adamant about not letting her do. I saw her begin to lose her balance and then watched as she began to fall. However, my paternal instincts did not kick in as they should have. Instead, my self preservation instinct engaged. I saw her heading for my feet and the split second thought was, not to save my child, but that her 90th percentile sized head was going to smash my already injured big toe so I just moved it out of the way and clunk! she hit the floor and started to cry. I looked at Azsure and she looked at me, then realizing the strangeness of me just letting her fall, we both started laughing. Soijer was not happy at all but we knew that she would live. Since then, I have been wondering about my paternal instincts. Whether or not they are there or just on vacation or have been chased away by days of fighting kids and nights of yelling babies. Oh well, we'll just have to find out.

I am still alive.....

In case you were wondering. Thats all for today.

The long weekend and other bric-a-brac

Well, the long independence day weekend is gone and so starts me back to regular weekday stuff. The parades went fairly well aside from me forgetting the words to one song over and over throughout the Dorr parade. It was a song that we sing very regularly but after I forgot them the first time, it was just repeated brain fart. I did remember it that last 2 times though at the end. We had a really big cookout that evening and had lots of friends over. Ephram, however, is not a fan of the fourth of july in general. He had to be brought home by my wife from the parade right after the fire engines went by due to the noise. That evening someone set off a big explosive in the neighborhood and he went totally crazy shaking and screaming. After a lot of hand holding and putting the biggest, loudest fan next to his head in his bedroom, I got him to sleep and he slept through the rest of the night. We had a nice weekend of lounging since all of the work that is normally to be done on the weekend was done during the week due to the party.
On to other things......
It has become apparent that some of you found my blog about sweet wasp murder to be somewhat funny. Well, I am here to report that I have found no wasp nests this year near my house. That is none, nada, zero, zilch. Apparently the wasps have recognized my strong but fair warnings and have taken the appropriate steps to ensure their survival. Nature has a way of continuing eh? I will come to your house and do the same for a small fee. ( yes, I am now an official wasp mercenary)
One of my old buddies requested that I recount a story about an unfortunate incident regarding a hot pocket and the robot dance. Unfortunately, I cannot remember the details very well. The gist of it is: at a time in my life (a couple of years ago) when I was for some reason doing the robot dance throughout my house for my own entertainment, there was and incident where a woman cut in front of me while I was trying to get a hot pocket at the local grocery store. Instead of pushing her out of the way or giving some snide comment, I robot danced at her in a threatening fashion. Maybe I had just watched "you got served" or some other movie where instead of shooting each other, the rival gangs just dance at each other. I cant remember. All I do know is that after that day, I had to reevaluate my robot dancing . I am happy to say that I have not used the robot dance as a weapon since.
That is all for now.

I dont blog...

I don't blog enough to keep it interesting. I apparently don't have the discipline or the memory to keep it up daily so instead there are these wonderful synopsi (right? plural of synopsis?) to catch up on what i've been doing in the last few weeks or months. So, here it comes, quickly before the kids find out that I'm downstairs and start unrolling all of the toilet paper rolls through the house. The church praise band played the west michigan conference service and it was really great. The band was loud and rowdy and the crowd responded. It was like having 700 of the best worshipers all in one place. It was a great experience. A fellow at home dad and I spent part of a day driving around taking pictures which was fun. We had Soijer with us but all the other kids were not so we had a decent non screaming morning. (on a humorous note, we found out later that we ended up at the local beach which is widely known as the gay nude beach. We both got a laugh when he told me but I had already assumed we were branded as a gay couple anyway. 2 guys wandering the beach with a baby in a backpack? yep. branded) Ephram went to Illinois for a visit and I had a very relaxed week with Soijer. We laid around, played on the floor and did some fun stuff. She was very sweet and barely cried all week. We were both happy when E got back home even though he immediately started taking all of her toys away. We are gearing up for the fourth of July. The praise band will load all of our gear onto a trailer and ride in the parade through door blasting music(at about 4000 watts mind you) in the faces of little kids and there parents then give them freeze pops. ( word to tom Jefferson, we're still keeping it real in the USA yo) Finally, Azsure's temporary job position is coming to a close and we are gearing up for the next step. It will most likely mean a move somewhere so I am looking for a good place to go that has a state farm office and a lower cost of living that west Michigan. Believe it or not Grand rapids is higher than a lot of places. It must be all the union labor. So far the options for a move are Bloomington, IL and Lincoln, NE. Bring on the corn, I say. As long as I don't have to learn a new phrase for pop, or soda, or coke or whatever, I'll be alright. I'll try to be a little more consistent with the blogging in the future.
out

ahh spring....and sweet wasp murder.

Spring is here and so are the gentle urgings to update my blog. So here I am filled with wisdom and whatnot to pass on to the small handful of people who read my blog.
Spring has arrived and with it my nemesis. The wasp. As long as I have been a homeowner, I have despised the arrival of the wasps and wasp nests. I really despise them. Especially the little yellow jacket kind. If they would just stay out of my face, and grill for that matter, we could peacefully coexist. but they don't. I walk out the door and I get a facial buzzing flyby and it drives me nuts. Therefore, back about 8 years ago, I began a Hedges family tradition: The Hedges Family Annual wasp cleansing. At the first sign of a wasp, I wander the perimeter of the house and issue a stern eviction notice to all of the wasps that are in earshot. I then wait a few days to give them a chance to find other accommodations (I am tough but fair) After that, my property becomes a wasp and hornet spray free-fire zone. I wander the yard with the foam 20ft spray (it never reaches 20 ft by the way) and systematically murder every wasp and wasp nest I see with extreme prejudice. I will chase them if they are in free flight if I have to. I offer no quarter because I know none would be offered to me should I stumble into a nest. Now, most people will knock down the nests after all of the wasps are dead. Not me. A nest covered in dead wasps serves as the perfect deterrent for other wasps thinking about moving into the neighborhood. I still have a dead carcass of a wasp on our wind chimes from 2 summers ago and have no intention of removing it. It will forever stand as a warning and a symbol of my commitment to driving the wasp out of my subdivision and therefore out of my life.

music revolution and increasing skepticism...

Two things have been growing these past few weeks and months. First, I have navigated away from talk radio an have been diving back into my music library and it has been a real joy. Revisiting the Beatles has been especially fun because it brings back a time when I was discovering music in a new way. Not as a background or entertainment, but really diving in to a song or album experience and letting it wash over me. It also brought some chuckles. ( i have a buddy, you know who you are, who told me one morning that the night before he was sure that "Across the Universe" had just appeared on his "Let it Be"album and was delivered to him directly from John Lennon). If you knew me in those days you wouldn't be surprised and, If memory serves me, we went out that very night and I'm pretty sure I had the same experience. Anywho, the whole experience has brought me back to an appreciation of good music (and obviously brought back my music snobbery, not that it ever really left). Which happens to be a good tie in to my next point.
It has recently occurred to me that i give everybody too much credit. And I dont just mean that i thought everybody should recognize a great album (Michael Jackson's Thriller) or a crappy one ( Justin Timberlake's new one). Please recognize that for arguments sake, I picked out a great album in a genre that I don't normally associate myself with to illustrate the fact that I am not showing any bias. I mean in all categories of life. i am now skeptical of all leadership which is not a big deal but now I am feeling a lack of confidence in professionals like doctors and business leaders because it appears that an enormous veil has been lifted from my eyes and has revealed that everyone is human and their opinions are not any better or more informed in mine. No kidding you say, but yep. I think that a lot of it has to do with the Michigan leadership. ( i will try not to rant here). I am baffled by some of the decisions made by our leadership. Really, its like: when did the patients start running the asylum? Apparently they always have been. another thing. The UAW is going to strike? I realize that they have a powerful union but I don't care who you are, why do you risk your job in an economy that is failing anyway. It all leads me to a fundamental lack of faith in people's judgment and reason. It is all kinda sad actually. I guess I have finally reached adulthood and see the sad state of real life. The only thing I guess I can do is hold on to what I have and try to improve the situation of those in my general vicinity.
On that note, I'll start making the world a better place one person at a time: here are some recommendations for great albums everyone should hear:
Sea Change by Beck
Revolver by The Beatles
Normal for Bridgewater by Peter Bruntnell
Car Wheels on a Gravel Road by Lucinda Williams

Maybe I'll list some more as they come to me and one day everybody will be enlightened and people like Miley Cirus and Mariah Carey will be out of a job.

until then.....

I am still alive. Here are a few things....

quick one today....

New Kathleen Edwards album.  Really good.  "and I sure a shit do love you, and I cuss because I mean it and for that in my heart I am hopeful.  And in the words that I chose I was so careful".  Nice. my new favorite Canadian. Sorry Neil, your yesterdays news.

Spring is still not quite here. I have been out for a few runs pushing the kids in the jogger which is nice. 

The new grill is good.  Made some really good crabcakes the other evening for a small group dinner.  Yum.  found the hotspot on the grill and burned a few though.  

Winter storm warning today???? Are you kidding me????? Allow me to reiterate my sentiments from an earlier blog: You still suck snow come back next year.  I'm moving to Miami.